pick a color, any color.
so long as it's not white...
tired of being called "white girl"

my favorite color is purple.
no, not indigo, that's a blue dye, not a color
i don't care what anybody else says.

i like green too, different shades of green,
the muddy brown-green color of my eyes,
or the bright yellow-green of new leaves...

red is a lovely color
passionate, strong, fierce
the color of blood and valentines.

yellow is very nice
playful and happy,
full of cheer

orange? oh yummm

blue?  i don't know about blue...
not today, thanks

just pick one for me, i seem to be having trouble deciding.  :-)

fear, like other emotions, serves a useful purpose.  helps keep us out of danger.  but...  it is also the main ingredient in the globalist agenda for world domination.

plato said (The Republic, 429c):

The city is courageous, then, because of a part of itself that has the power to preserve through everything its belief about what things are to be feared, namely, that they are the things and kinds of things that the lawgiver declared to be such in the course of educating it...

well, see.  plato does explain how they tell us what to fear.  it is called "education" and is basically the indoctrination into abusive institutions (through church, school, and media).  public opinion is created, then forced upon the masses who are unaware of how their very own beliefs have been given to them by authority.

why do they want us to be afraid?  oh, that's easy.  it's so we will choose (what is presented to us as) safety and security over freedom.  it is our choice to make, and the ones who think of themselves as "deciders" know that.

how do they make us choose this false sense of security?  they play on our fears.  fear is one of the strongest emotions.  if you can elicit an emotional response in a person, the thinking part of their brain turns off.  this is perhaps a useful function if you are being chased through the woods by an angry mastodon, when you must react and don't have time to think about it first.  but is not so useful when it creates a situation in which you turn off your brain and allow someone else to do your thinking for you.

the world doesn't need anyone to save it.  the world needs for humans to stop trying to control everyone and everything in the world, and it will all work out just fine.

i was led to believe that we need saving.  that we need some hero come save us.  that there are good guys and bad guys.  i questioned these beliefs, and found them unable to hold up to the things i know are true.

i was led to believe that children need strict discipline, to be taught to obey.  when i became a parent, i learned that this too was a false belief.  my children are not disobedient, and i believe this is because i do not expect them to obey.  it's really that simple.  and it works, freedom does, in real life.  my kids are living proof that when allowed to make their own decisions, humans choose to help each other.  the competition, the struggle and war that forms the basis of the heirarchical structure of our society, these are only symptoms of living with abuse.  human nature, instinct, has been set aside in favor of science and "progress" and that has hurt us all.  it has been beaten out of us, or so it would seem.  but i believe it's still there, inside everyone, screaming to be let out...  just set yourself free!  you can do it, i know you can.



how can we follow?  how can we follow?

pete's question answers itself.
we can't follow, not if we choose to be free.
nor can we lead, if we wish for others to be free.
it is our decision to make,
each and every one of us, for ourselves.

in march of last year, i suppose i was setting myself up for disappointment more than anything else, believing in justice and liberty and all those pretty words that don't mean shit when they come from politicians lips.  i was trying to get local support for the Longest Walk 2, trying to spread the word, talk about the message that all land is sacred.  i made me some enemies in the process, but their enemies are now my friends, so something good came of it anyway.  i left zaadz to focus my energies on this project, for several months i spent 50 hours a week of my own time and managed to only get six people to help out.  it was quite the letdown, but i learned a lot from it.

(edit...  i just checked.  it wasn't until april that they confirmed the plan to come through chattanooga.  so i'm off by a month.  but i'm too lazy to come up with a new blog entry for today...  so there!)

yes!

no!

by having an open mind.

what is it you really want?  how can you get it if you don't even know what it is?

i looked inside, and it wasn't easy.  it was real scary.  there's demons in there, you know. but there's something even better in there, a fire, and those demons don't like that fire so much.  everybody's got a little spark of something inside them.  your fire might be totally different than mine is, most likely very different.  that's how it works, see.  that's what is so wonderful about all of it.  and nobody, not anyone else, can tell you what it is or how to find it.  the ones who say they can, that's just their big puffed up egos talkin, which isn't really any different than those demons i mentioned up there earlier, you know.  burn all that junk off and you're left with what's really you.   :-)

x

ask them.  i can't speak for anyone but me.

rain

trust and faith are difficult words.  i don't like them.  don't use those words if i can find better ones.  i removed the "in the world" from the question.  maybe i can attempt to answer it.  the only thing i have found to never let me down...  is something very difficult to put into words.  call it spirit guide, but the modern, christianized version of native spirituality that comes to mind is not at all what i'm talking about.  it is in my blood, though, no matter what anyone else wants to think.  sometimes it comes to me as the voice of my ancestors.  maybe it's my dna, the code that determines who i am.  but that's not quite right either, it's more than that.  sometimes it comes to me as memories of past lives.  it is something apart from me, yet the only way i can find it is to look within.  it's something so different, so very different than any words that i can think of to try to describe it.  maybe english isn't the right language to use to talk about such things.

i left behind difficult memories.  or so it seemed.  the past was with me all along, though, even if i couldn't remember what had happened.  you can't escape from your own past, it follows you wherever you go.

i am unaware of any good reason for war to continue, for people to abuse others, for authority to believe in its right to rule by might.  i am unaware of any rational justification for such things to continue.  i am unaware of the rationale behind society's acceptance of abuse, perhaps it just isn't there.  that seems to make sense.  maybe i can't find it because it simply does not exist.

words

i'm a mom.

(oh, and sometimes i like to complain about the government.)